Edea's Story: Concerning Seifer
by SaberSonofSeifer
Summary: Seifer discovers Edea is his sister and all heck breaks loose (This Fanfic contains some sexual content and adult humor)


Yes, I know, Edea isn't really his sister, leave me alone about that.  
  
Selphie, Rinoa, Zell, Irvine, and Squall were standing around in a fighting stance, waiting for Seifer, the Sorceress's Knight to attack.  
  
"I think YOU fools are jealous of me!" Seifer smirked.  
  
"Seifer…what are you TALKING about?" Squall was utterly confused. He stuck his gunblade in the ground and leaned on it.  
  
"I mean, I get to have sex with a BEAUTIFUL sorceress and you…well, you have to settle for that!" Seifer indicated Rinoa.  
  
"Hey! You big meany!" Rinoa saying this made Zell and Irvine laugh. "What?" She was more confused than Squall.  
  
"BEAUTIFUL?! Have you SEEN Edea?" He looked at Edea, then back at Seifer. At Edea, then Seifer, Edea, Seifer, Edea, Seifer. "I mean what in name of Hyne's Great Aunt Billy is that THING on her EAR?!"  
  
"It's…a…growth…it'll…go away…" Seifer was at a loss for words. "Enough! I destroy you know, then I get to have sex with Edea!"  
  
Selphie chimed in "Isn't Edea your sister, Squall?" She had a habit of being stupid.  
  
Seifer took this opportunity to jest at Squall's misfortune. "That's right, Squall, she IS your sister!" He smirked. "How do you feel about me dating your sister??"  
  
"Seifer," Squall responded with a slight edge of humor, "She's YOUR sister too…"  
  
"She's my sister…too? I had sex with my SISTER?!?!?!?!?!" He was horrified at the thought. "Wait," he said. "If I'm her sister-"  
  
"Brother," Zell corrected.  
  
"Thanks chicken-wuss." Seifer continued, "If I'm her BROTHER then that means…" He looked over at Squall. Seifer's eyes got all teary and he put his arms out. "BROTHER!" He ran towards Squall, arms extended.  
  
"Eh? NO! GET AWAY SEI-" He was cut off as Seifer hugged Squall tightly.  
  
"MY BABY BROTHER! I'M SO HAPPY!" Seifer was crying now.  
  
"Se-Seifer….get….get off….can't…breathe….." Squall was gasping for breath as Seifer let go of him. At this time Zell and Selphie were sharing the headphones for a Discman and Rinoa was hopping around trying to listen in. Irvine was standing cleaning his gun with his shirt. When he stoped he realized that his shirt was now all dirty. Stupid Irvine.  
  
Edea decided to join in on the festivities. "I am so happy to be your sister! Although I don't like you anymore, Seifer, I mean, that's just nasty."  
  
Selphie heard this and said, "Yeah, just think of the children!"  
  
"Common, I didn't know, sis!"  
  
"Seifer, just cause you love bangin' your sister doesn't mean-" Irvine was cut off as Seifer hurled a rock at his forhead. "Ow! Man, that hurt! Dude!"  
  
"Dude! Dude! Dude!" Selphie made up a new song, oh joy. You can always count on Selphie to make a stupid situation even stupider.  
  
"She's not really your sister, ya know" Irvine decided to intervene.  
  
"Oh THANK you Rajin, thank you SOOOO much." Zell's sarcasm was extremely overstressed.  
  
"She's not my sister?" Seifer was confused now, too.  
  
"Well, we don't really know, you know" Squall said.  
  
"We don't know you know I know?" Selphie loved games like this.  
  
"Quiet Sefie." Irvine wasn't taking any crap. Good job Irvine! Stupid little cowboy ::mutter mutter:: looks like a woman…::mutter mutter::…  
  
The argument lasted for hours. In normal cases, well, this would have ended with a group orgy. But in THIS story…  
  
"Lets go get some ice cream everybody!" Selphie was being stupid again.  
  
"I know…lets have a group orgy!" Edea's comment was strange and out of the ordinary.  
  
"Edea? You alright? You just said something stupid, kinda like Selphie but more vulgar." Seifer was feeling better now, not feeling bad for having sex with his sister.  
  
Squall fell over laughing. His laughter caused the group to get an odd, rather puzzled look on their faces. "I-I-I-I…" he made that "eeee" sound again. "I just remembered that Seifer had sex with his sister!"  
  
"brother! That's not nice! Why did you say that!" Seifer was being Selphie.  
  
"Can't we all just get along?" Selphie was saying this as Zell attached her to a t-board and kicked it floating down the hall. "HEY! ZELL! NOOOOooooooooooo!!"  
  
Irvine stood up "THANK YOU Zell." He yawned. "Rinoa, wanna go have sex?"  
  
"Why is EVERYBODY talking about sex?!" Rinoa hates conversations if they don't involve her pet dog Angelo. Which could be a problem because all the conversations going on now were about sex.  
  
"Because it's more interesting than your stupid dog," Irvine snaped  
  
"MY DOG IS NOT STUPID!" Rinoa was furious  
  
"He tried to bite me," Edea said. "That's pretty stupid right there"  
  
Rinoa started to cry. "Squall…honey…take me home…pleeeeease?"  
  
"What? I'm not your honey."  
  
"Yes you are!" She ran up and grabbed onto his arm and tried to kiss him.  
  
"Rinoa, go away!" Squall was repulsed  
  
"But I love you!" Rinoa's eyes started to tear up.  
  
Squall sighed. "Alright Rinoa." He moved to the left. "No!"  
  
"but…you just said"  
  
"Rinoa! I love you!" Seifer said this, starteling everybody  
  
"But…"Edea was saddened by this news "I thought you loved me, Seifer!  
  
That's when a huge meteor came down and killed everybody so that this stupid and horrifying fan fiction would end. SO END ALREADY  
  
The End. 


End file.
